User:IncredibleJake
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Don't let my name fool you, the only place that I am incredible is in my own mind. If you want to describe me in one sentence, try the following pre-prepared one:
Jake is a mixture of Becker, Oscar The Grouch and Dr. House all rolled into a single person.
[edit] Bet you didn't know that:
- I hold the official world record for the largest collection of human excrement stored in jars.
- I invented electricity.
- I am the great nephew of Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, and as such, receive healthy royalties thanks to stupid, rich celebrities.
- Because of the large amount of free money I receive, I don't have a job, but I do have an $800 a day, heroin addiction.
- One of the veins in my penis is the same thickness as a pencil.
[edit] For Those Who Are Interested
- Vandalise my page all you want. Believe me when I say: I can deal with it
- People who incorporate quotes from Austin Powers, The Simpsons or South Park into their daily vocabulary are of great annoyance to me.
- I should try being nicer to nerds. Because one day my computer is going to break down, and I'm going to need someone to fix it.
- There is no difference between nerds and geeks. And if you disagree with me, odds are you are one.
- The current odds of me being permanently blocked from this website before the end of 2006 would appear to be rather high.
- I have been experiencing an infux of computer viruses in recent weeks. The odds of them coming from a disgruntled Wikipedia user and/or administrator would also appear to be rather high.
- If anyone wishes to challenge me to an "attack page showdown", please provide me with at least 48 hours notice.
- If anyone out there in Wikiland has a problem with me, please feel free to use my discussion page. But let me assure everyone that I would sooner sodomise my own grandmother before deliberately upsetting this fragile society.
