Talk:Edwin Alderson

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	Edwin Alderson has been listed as one of the History good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can delist it, or ask for a reassessment.
November 28, 2007 Good article nominee Listed

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[edit] GA Review: On hold

I have reviewed this article according to the requirements of the GA criteria and have put the article on hold at this time. Address the following issues within seven days and I'll pass the article:

1. In the infobox, mention in the caption that the image was taken at the time of WWI.

Done. Date given.

1. "His experience with mounted infantry made him perfect for this role as in the Boer guerillas..." Reword perfect, it may be seen as POV; however, if it is stated in a source then put it in quotation marks and add an inline citation directly after the sentence.

Changed to "ideal".

1. "When Hughes' representative in England, Colonel John Wallace Carson, secured preferential accommodation for the Canadian soldiers at the expense of a British brigade, Alderson refused the barracks and in doing so, made both Carson and Hughes into determined enemies; Carson wrote to the Canadian Prime Minister Robert Laird Borden that Alderson "does not treat our men with a firm iron hand covered with the velvet glove which their special temperaments require"." Instead of using the semicolon, I think it would be best to split it into two sentences as it is already long enough as it is.

Done.

1. "In addition to his personal failings however, the Ross rifles had proven almost useless in battle and Alderson's officer corps had performed poorly, in particular Brigadier-General Garnet Burk Hughes, Sam Hughes' son." Add an inline citation for this. If it is from the same source at the end of the paragraph, just readd it again to the end of this sentence as well.

Sourced.

1. "Hughes was furious at Alderson's defiance and sent 281 letters to senior military figures backing the Ross and attacking Alderson's character." Add an inline citation.

Sourced.

1. "In September 1916, Alderson became Inspector of Infantry in the British Army, a position he retained until 1920, when he retired from active service aged 61." Consider rewording "aged 61" to "at the age of 61" unless this is common British English grammar.

I think both are correct, changed to "at the age of".

1. "...commenting to a friend that "Canadian politics has been too strong for us"." Again, add the inline citation after this statement.

Sourced.

1. Consider adding an image of a Ross rifle and/or Lee-Enfield for the article.

Added images of both for comparison, images are best avaliable on Wikipedia at the moment.

These should be for the most part easy to fix, and if addressed within seven days, I will pass the article. If you have any questions or when you are done, let me know on my talk page and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. --Nehrams2020 (talk) 07:30, 28 November 2007 (UTC)

Thankyou for your review, I think I have addressed all the issues above, let me know if there are still problems. Regards, --Jackyd101 (talk) 15:45, 28 November 2007 (UTC)

[edit] GA passed

Since the above issues were addressed, I have passed this article as a good article according to the requirements of the GA criteria. Continue to improve the article, making sure that all new information is properly sourced. Also, to anyone that is reading this review, please consider reviewing an article or two at WP:GAN to help with the large backlog. Instructions can be found here. Keep up the good work, and I hope that you continue to bring articles up to Good Article status. If you have any further questions about this review, let me know on my talk page and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. I have updated the article history to reflect this review. Happy editing! --Nehrams2020 (talk) 20:49, 28 November 2007 (UTC)